Paranoia #51. I’m wondering if……

someone sneaked into our house and replaced our eating utensils. This might seem a bit paranoid but i’m pretty sure this is not the first time that someone is out to get me. I began suspecting that something had changed when I first noticed that an increasing amount of my meal is ending up in my lap or on the front of my shirt. I suspect the replacement flatware is of some dastardly design that causes food to slide off my spoon. My wife, Susie, does not agree with this assessment, telling me that I’m imagining things and that my age is probably to blame. She also wants to blame the notion she has that I stick my tongue out when placing the utensil in my mouth. I don’t believe her but nonetheless, have watched myself eat with a hand held mirror. (I wasn’t using the mirror to eat with, but rather to watch). The results of this experiment are inconclusive.


About geetwo

I am a 69 year old (in 2009) retired I.T. consultant. My wife, Susie and I travel in an RV 6 to 8 months a year. I write a humor / travel column for several print publications on a weekly basis.
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